signs.. i tried talking to him today.. but he don't seems to be ready to talk.. haix.. i don't know.. i just feel very vexed and wanna sort things out with him as soon as possible.. but.. don't know lahh.. i'll call him later to see how.. cause if we continue to ignore each other, both of us will be sad still.. so solve the problem soon will be better bahh. haix. okays..
yarhh.. that's what i think.. even if the ending is not gonna be nice, i'll be sadder, but at least my mind has a goal, which is to forget him.. now, my mind is having him still and my heart still wanna be with him.. that's why.. i know it's hard to let go and forget about him.. but at least.. i know i'll have to.. so i won't be like now.. so confused.. haix.. i think only wilson and nicole understands my situation now bahh. haix.. i feel so horrible.. i feel so disgusted.. i made my own life so sad.. and make my friends so worried about me.. i'm a failure in life.. a failure friend. a lousy friend. what should i say.. i don't know.. he made me feel so terrible. he make me feel as though i'm a very bad.. haix.. don't know.. feel so vexed is all i can say now.. :(
i miss him.. it's true.. i want him, it's true too.. i can't bear to let go of him.. it's true too. but what should i do? i don't know. i really don't.. haix... i wanna be loved by him, pampered by him.. cared by him.. but why can't he give me those things? why can't he treat me the way he treats me four years ago?? the nicest boyfriend i ever had.. the best mann in my life.. my perfect boy.. the boy who always tell me how much he needs me, how much he loves me, how much he want me by his side.. the many 'i love you' a day.. the many 'i miss you' a day.. the many hugs a days. the many seeing see each other a day.. the many letters a day.. the sweet and loving moments of ours.. why must it vanish? why? i want those days back.. i miss those days.. the days when we spend time playing swing at the park.. spend time chatting at the park.. spend time playing in the rain.. taking a romantic stroll under the rain.. those loving days.. i miss them.. i miss those days.. haix.. but now, they vanished, i don't know where they've gone to, but i'm trying hard to seek for it still.. i'm still having hopes to find those days back.. i don't know when.. ut i hope it'll be back to me soon...
[[ the feeling has gone, with the flow of time,
the love has too, vanish with the flow of time..
we were once a happy couple..
and the moments we had are marvellous..
but sorry my dear i let you go..
it's just sorry i can say,
to decieve myself my guiltiness..
i hope you'll be happy,
is from the bottom of my heart..
and the last thing i wanna say..
take care my dear friend and i'll be missing you.. ]]
this little entry, is dedicated to someone who knows who he is.. i hope you'll be happy.. forever.. :)
Yarhh.. okays. no mood for blogging lerx.. tired.. take care to all..
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